I was brought up in a very negative environment. My parents dragged my siblings and I through a bitter divorce that lasted over 9 years (you heard right!) At the time, it was in the history books of our county for being the longest lasting custody battle in history.
Despite my rocky start, I feel that I am not a negative person. I believe that I try and find the positive in situations that have worked their way into my life. However, a close family member always seeks opportunities to imbue his negative opinions relating to my lifestyle and choices. I am not alone. He does this to everyone and always seems to know the “right” thing to do. He is the expert on all topics and is always at the ready to unleash his so-called pearls of wisdom on anyone who will listen.
My husband and I have both suffered through the reality of cancer. We have dealt with my diagnosis and treatment choices and then had to go through the same when my husband was diagnosed with kidney cancer six months later. We have come through the financial hardship of it all and are now rebuilding our lives. After 4 years, we have finally managed to get caught up with our bills, in part because we had to short sale on our home of 11 years. No one can possibly know how difficult our lives were during these difficult times without having lived through a similar situation.
Our most important life choices, however, come from nutrition and keeping our immune systems strong. There is nothing more annoying and frustrating than someone who feels they should step in and question or denigrate our much thought out decisions. We have taken on a new philosophy about how we eat and the supplements we have worked with our holistic doctors to incorporate into our regimes. We now believe that quality in the long run outweighs quantity. While, yes we spend more on food and quality supplements, we feel that in the end we will benefit with improved health and lower healthcare costs.
However, this family member calls himself a child of the depression and is quick to point out how little he pays for things. He always wants to know what we pay for things that we buy so he can quickly point out how much less he pays. While this does not have an impact on what I buy and the decisions I make, it does frustrate me and make me angry.
My husband and I have been healthy and cancer free in our lives since our initial diagnoses. We believe in our lifestyle and don’t appreciate the comments that are ill-informed nor are they helpful. We don’t feel it is our place to tell others how to live their lives, why do some feel like it is their place to muscle their opinions in on our lifestyle? Is it a type of jealousy because we have become much more disciplined and rigorous about our choices for the good of our health? I believe this is part of it because this person is overweight and seems obsessed with our ability to maintain a healthy weight and don’t hit the cookie jar nightly.
The point here is to not let negative forces interrupt your desire to live a better life. Don’t let ignorance outweigh sensible, well-informed choices. And most importantly, make choices that make you happy. It is your life, your way. If you have a negative force in your life, I would love to hear about it. Let me know how you handle the situation. Do you let it go, like we do, for the purpose of keeping the peace?